FOR BUSINESS SUCCESS, FIND AND FOLLOW YOUR COMPANY CAPTAIN

FOR BUSINESS SUCCESS, FIND AND FOLLOW YOUR COMPANY CAPTAIN

Boat sailor find and follow your company captain

For business success, find and follow your company captain.

The year 2020 demonstrated yet again how little we control the world around us. So, be cautious about spending 2021 reading or listening to every good idea to protect your team against the next unknown.  

There are too many good ideas and not enough time, energy, and personnel to implement them all. Worse, some good ideas press against others. So if you commit to a decentralized, remote workforce, then management by walking around must be redefined for effectiveness. Likely there’s a better metaphor for the type of management you’ll need than walking around.  

Find And Follow Your Company Captain Who Demonstrates Convictions

Leaders need convictions – a commitment to certain core principles that inform values and guide decision-making. This is not an unwillingness to ever change course or a refusal to admit they are wrong, but it is a presumption in favor of these principles. For example, Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, DISC, Enneagram – each is a great personality assessment.

My personal conviction is that Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is the best assessment to use in the context of family, DISC in the context of employment, and Enneagram in the context of young adults looking to understand themselves. That could change, but I am not searching each day for a new assessment to use. I use these until I am persuaded that there is a better one for the purpose I am pursuing.

Find And Follow Your Company Captain Who Is Service Focused

Rather than sell products I focus on serving actual customer needs. I don’t care if we follow the precise guidelines of a framework (Supernova, EOS/Traction, Good to Great, StrengthFinders 2.0); I care that we adapt the framework to their needs. We don’t serve the frameworks, the frameworks provide support to us.  

How do you begin?

Start by writing down your core principles, your convictions, and consider how they inform your values and guide your decision-making. If the results are ill-defined, chaotic, or contradictory, then you will need to refine your convictions. Once you establish your principles, then focus on living them out more fully and effectively until you recognize a need to add to or adapt them further.  

Life is too short to be a research project.

You need to live. Start with the materials you have. Tap into the wise counsel of others.

Begin using the good ideas you find compelling and fit them to your organization without worrying that there’s another good, possibly better, idea that you’re missing. Think of convictions as the captain of your ship. As long as you train sailors, you can spend time searching for those capable of being captain. And, while port is safe, ships are meant for open water.

Once you set sail, your captain must be in place. This will be someone selected from among many good candidates and you can never be sure that your selection is best. But when storms burst upon you and threaten your intended course, you will have a capable leader. You won’t be scrambling to identify and select a leader when you are least able to focus – in the midst of the storm. Keep training your captain while at sea. (Refine your convictions while on your journey.)

Don’t attempt to perfect them before you’re willing to set sail. Instead of focusing on keeping your team safe from life’s unknowns, prepare them to meet and manage through those challenges while continuing to your destination.

Find And Follow Your Company Captain Who Stays On Course

The leaders whose teams continued on course despite all that 2020 hurled at them, began the year with clear convictions, with a company captain in place. Others recognized, too late, that they lacked a captain or were still searching for the best candidate from among an endless supply of possibilities. We don’t know what 2021 will bring, but we can be prepared if we find and follow our captain!  

About Julian Consulting

Dr. Stephen Julian is President of Julian Consulting, a firm specializing in team health, effective communication, and leadership development. He has worked with leaders and their teams for nearly 30 years in a variety of settings – including Africa, South and Central America.

https://www.julianconsulting.org

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When Business Is A Rat Race Don’t Outpace Yourself At Work

When Business Is A Rat Race Don’t Outpace Yourself At Work

Crowd of runners outpace yourself at work

Business can seem like a rat race. But don’t outpace yourself at work.

Instead, think of your life and leadership like a pace car. So you can ramp up to race speed quickly and safely, but regroup when faced with danger.

Some of us race ahead believing that victory comes to the swiftest, but forgetting that undisciplined speed kills.   Here are three helpful hints for leaders who want to pace themselves appropriately.

Don’t Outpace Yourself At Work By Assuming You’re The Smartest Person In the Room

You may, in fact, be the smartest person in the room. But for many leaders, especially young leaders, their IQ outpaces their EQ.   Effective leadership is not founded on brilliance alone. Leadership combines skills and character qualities that attract others to follow. Effective leaders often are not the smartest person in the room and the wisest ones are not only aware of this, but celebrate this fact. Ross Perot built a reputation and a fortune by surrounding himself with people who loved to win, many of whom knew more about the technical aspects of his business than he did. (If you want to read several interesting and inspiring quotes from Perot, click here.)

Relax. It’s great to be smart. It’s wiser to surround yourself with people who are inspired by your commitment to your mission, your love for your colleagues, and your drive to serve your customers. Develop your EQ. Combine a growing EQ with your inborn IQ and your influence will grow.  

Don’t Outpace Yourself At Work By Worrying About Trust

To the midlevel leader caught in the midst of warring superiors – “It’s not about you.” It feels like it’s about you, but it isn’t.

I’ve fallen for this more than once. When superiors give conflicting guidance and set inconsistent expectations. It feels like they don’t trust me. It feels like I’m the issue and I want to ask them directly, “What do I need to do to be allowed to operate as though I’m trusted?”  

The problem is that these leaders are fighting amongst themselves and I’m the pawn in their game. It’s not about me. Focus instead on providing a solution to these leaders. Lay out a path that allows each to share concerns while agreeing to a process enabling you to act. Focus on solving the log jam, not how it makes you feel. Slow down. It’s not about you.

Don’t Outpace Yourself At Work By Getting Carried Away By Enthusiasm

Some of us become enthusiastic when conversing with others. We get excited by ideas and opportunities and, if we are not careful, can express commitments in the moment that we are either unable or unwilling to fulfill.  

I suggest two solutions to this challenge.

First, recognize and acknowledge momentary enthusiasms. “Derek, this is incredibly exciting and I am drawn to what you’re describing. Before I commit, however, I need to take some time to think about how this fits within my current priorities. Let’s talk again next week and I’ll be in a better position to let you know my answer.”  

Second, don’t live in fear that you’re going to promise what you can’t deliver, but don’t promise when you don’t need to. In other words, don’t curb your enthusiasm to the point that you lose one of your attractive and influential qualities.

Take It Easy. What’s The Rush?

At the same time, don’t get ahead of yourself. Or give more than the situation asks for. Promise only when you are ready for your “yes” to be “yes.”  Broaden the base of your appeal by growing your EQ. Recognize the difference between situations that feel like they are about you and those that really are. Choose to give yourself space to make wise decisions. Find the pace that works for you. Not only will you avoid hitting the wall, but you will enjoy the journey that is your race.  

About Julian Consulting

Dr. Stephen Julian is President of Julian Consulting, a firm specializing in team health, effective communication, and leadership development. He has worked with leaders and their teams for nearly 30 years in a variety of settings – including Africa, South and Central America.

https://www.julianconsulting.org

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Beat The Zoom Meeting Blues

Beat The Zoom Meeting Blues

computer screen showing a zoom meeting

By now you might be suffering from zoom meeting blues. Ready to call it quits on zoom meetings? You’re not alone.

How One Worker Beat His Company Zoom Meeting

I watched a fascinating video where a young man employed in a tech company decided to automate his participation video conference team meetings. He explains how for one week he never participated live but only used prerecorded clips of himself to fool his colleagues (and boss) into thinking he was in the meeting. He concluded that his approach didn’t save time and he was nervous as he waited to see if his automated responses were convincing.

Why He Succeeded In Disappearing From The Zoom Meeting

He was successful, in large part, because there were several people in the meetings and the expectation of his involvement was minimal. His most impressive feats were automating his pitch of a proposal to his boss, his apology to his teammates at the end of the week, and his prerecorded response to their surprise.

Further, he noted that he was successful, in large part, because there were several people in the meetings and the expectation of his involvement was minimal. His most impressive feats were automating his pitch of a proposal to his boss, his apology to his teammates at the end of the week, and his prerecorded response to their surprise. What fascinated me was how no one picked up on his technical glitches. In order to fill time, he looped one five-minute video backward and forward. This meant that repeatedly he was “unsipping” his coffee. Then there was the accidental inclusion of a black frame that popped up from time to time. In both cases, his deception went unnoticed.

What does this mean for your zoom meeting?  

First, recognize that if one person was able to do this and post about his success, others will build on his techniques to further automate virtual participation in virtual meetings. Second, virtual participation is already happening in numerous low-tech ways. “Participants” dial in but don’t turn on video or keep themselves muted throughout the meeting. They may be texting just out of sight of the camera or checking e-mail on another portion of their large monitors.  

Questions To Ask About Holding A Zoom Meeting

Does this team member need to be included in this meeting? How should each team member prepare before the meeting so that it is maximally productive? Is there a purpose to the meeting? What do you plan to accomplish? How will you know if it is a success?  

If you can’t answer these questions before the meeting, then you’re not ready to proceed. You are in danger of having a meeting to plan another meeting.  One team told me they hadn’t met for months, virtually or in-person, during much of last year. Not surprisingly, their business and team cohesion was suffering.

When teams maintain regularly scheduled, interactive check-in calls

Their business grows and team cohesion remains strong. Team members need to interact regularly. I’d even encourage you to “strategically waste time together” – something I learned from an early mentor. Time invested in sharing about personal interests and lives outside of work can be healthy. You’re already up against some significant challenges with virtual meetings. Participants are “always on.”

Normally, Beth can scratch her nose, knowing that everyone is looking at Chad who is presenting from the other end of the conference room. On Zoom, Beth is always visible to everyone on the call. This is part of why she chooses to not share her video. Participants can’t have side conversations that build comradery and relieve tension. They can’t lean over and whisper, “I hope your kids made it to school today despite the weather.”

There is no whispering on Zoom – instead, team members are often texting behind the scenes to each other. Make sure your meetings are consistently scheduled, properly attended, and interactive. If most of your meetings involve everyone listening to a talking head, then don’t be surprised to discover a “participant” is a prerecorded image of himself. Sadly, to a poorly planned and executed meeting, virtual or actual attendance may make no difference!  

About Julian Consulting

Dr. Stephen Julian is President of Julian Consulting, a firm specializing in team health, effective communication, and leadership development. He has worked with leaders and their teams for nearly 30 years in a variety of settings – including Africa, South and Central America.

https://www.julianconsulting.org

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The Dangerous, Beautiful And Life-Giving Capacity Of Laughter

The Dangerous, Beautiful And Life-Giving Capacity Of Laughter

Young Girl Beautiful and life-giving capacity of laughter

There’s a dangerous, beautiful and life-giving capacity of laughter. It depends on circumstances. And how laughter is managed.

But I think we all agree that laughter itself is good.

Throughout history some people have attempted to subvert this life-giving capacity. The 1800s offered prescriptive dictionaries, alongside the descriptive dictionaries we have today. Prescriptive dictionaries attempted to tell you exactly what each word meant. Ambiguity was dead and vagueness was eliminated. All was clear; each meaning precise. Thankfully those dictionaries failed. Had they succeeded, art, literature, and humor would each have succumbed. Humans need the creative possibilities within language to foster life-giving laughter.

“Oh boy, where’s he going with this one?”

The Beautiful And Life-Giving Capacity Of Laughter Is Intentional

As leaders of teams and managers of individuals, you are fostering culture within your organization. That culture can be healthy or toxic, motivating or life-sucking, rewarding or exploitative, and so on. There should be a place for humor and laughter within your culture. But recognize that humor itself can be healthy or toxic, motivating or life-sucking, rewarding or exploitative.

Consider the intentionality of humor. Do you explicitly encourage humor and laughter or is it a nervous byproduct of team interactions? Is it considered a desirable part of your culture or something to be avoided?

Consider the subject of humor.

Are you able to laugh at yourself or do you prefer to laugh at others? What topics will you suggest or allow?

Consider the risk vs. benefit of humor. What does your culture gain from laughter? What might it lose?

Increasingly, leaders seek to foster organizations comprised of diverse people. As we diversify, we increase the likelihood that senses of humor will diverge and that what one person finds laughable, another finds cringeworthy.

What are you to do? Encourage laughter focusing on the natural limitations of people (remembering to laugh at yourself). Take advantage of the ambiguity and vagueness of language without elevating the pun to a status to which it should never aspire. Topics should be general ones that most will find amusing (“all” is a bar that is set too high).

Humor Can Be Dangerous And Destructive

Avoid humor focusing on people’s values, physical appearance, intellect, politics, or religion. Of course, if your intellect fails you at some point and you are able to laugh at yourself, then do so.

Recognize that a team member’s level of professional and personal security will impact her ability to laugh at herself and to appreciate being the subject of others’ laughter.

Two boys Beautiful and life-giving capacity of laughter

Recognize that sarcasm may be witty, but it is too confusing to be productive in the workplace. Were you speaking seriously or making a joke? We can’t tell.

Recognize that people aren’t always going to let you know when they’ve been hurt or are uncomfortable, so don’t assume that someone laughing along with you means they are comfortable with the joke. If you are in a position of power or authority, remember you can laugh more easily and freely than others who must read the wind to know whether to join in.

The Beautiful And Life-Giving Capacity Of Laughter Is Culturally Fostered

With all of this in mind, however, do not avoid humor. Foster a culture that risks the beautiful danger of laughter. Just because it can be cruel, divisive, and harmful doesn’t mean you shouldn’t embrace its life-giving qualities. You’re not going to quit using a knife to prepare food just because you could cut off your finger. It’s quite likely you will continue to use knives even if you have cut off one finger.

If you risk a culture of humor you will offend. That offense needn’t be intentional and it can provide opportunity for another life-affirming practice – apology and forgiveness. Please don’t neglect the beautiful danger of laughter. It’s an essential part of your humanity. Just tailor it to the setting, making sure it is reflective of the culture you seek to foster.

About Julian Consulting

Dr. Stephen Julian is President of Julian Consulting, a firm specializing in team health, effective communication, and leadership development. He has worked with leaders and their teams for nearly 30 years in a variety of settings – including Africa, South and Central America.

https://www.julianconsulting.org

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And I’ll send you my article: Exaggerate to Make Your Presentations Funny. You’ll learn how to punch up your presentations with humor.

Principles For Parenting Adult Children

Principles For Parenting Adult Children

Family picture of parenting adult children

Parenting adult children is different than parenting young children. At the only graduation party we attended this season, I was talking with a friend, saying that I’m learning to release with our three young adult children. “You should write about that in your next newsletter,” she said.

So here are some principles I’ve learned for parenting adult children.  

Our three children are 24, 22, and 21. My days of commanding are over. I’ve moved from a position of authority to influence. Many times over the past few years I’ve said something like this to one of our children: “You’re an adult. I can’t tell you what to do and I trust you to make a wise decision. For what it’s worth, here’s what I think about this situation.”

When Parenting Adult Children You Can Remind them Them “This is what you said you wanted

When our oldest was married this month we celebrated the birth of a new family comprised of him and his wife. We knew we were raising a complete human who would have his own beliefs, values, and would make his own decisions. We weren’t looking to keep that cute kid a child forever. So, here we are. We said we wanted a functional adult and we celebrate his emergence.

When Parenting Adult Children Keep In Mind They Still Care About What You Think

It’s amazing how the words of a parent carry extra weight throughout life. When my dad tells me he’s proud of me, it matters. Your young adult children care what you think about them and their decisions even if they go to great lengths to hide that fact. Keep sharing your insights when invited and pray for other adults to speak into their lives when you’re not invited to share your wisdom.  

Hand releases butterfly of parenting adult children

When Parenting Adult Children Remember Releasing Isn’t Giving Up

No one is perfect. We can all mature more fully and become better versions of ourselves – right up to our last breath. By releasing, you aren’t giving up on your children, you are simply acknowledging what is true. You are no longer the one who should be making their decisions. This isn’t an on/off switch but a dimmer that has been growing brighter for years.

When Parenting Adult Children Remember You Thought You Were A Fully Grown Adult When You Were Their Age

At 23, I had a master’s degree and was teaching undergraduates whose parents were sacrificing a lot of money for me to teach their children. I thought I was a complete adult, capable of mixing it up with other adults who were past their prime but, unfortunately, unaware of their condition. Your children are no different. They think they’re grown up and will respond better if you treat them as the adults they are, rather than waiting for them to be the adults you think they should be.

When Parenting Adult Children Two Of The Most Powerful Words – “Mature” & “Trust”

For years, I’ve been telling our kids that I see them maturing and pointing to examples that support that claim. When they have an important decision to make, I tell them I trust them. Why? Because I see them maturing and I trust them, but also because it is amazing how humans try to live up to the expectations of others, particularly the expectations of their parents. I might as well use words that encourage wise decisions.

If They Are Xing (i.e., some undesired behavior)? They Have To Live With The Consequences

We’ve taught our children that we do not support sex outside of marriage and we have made abstinence an expectation within our home. Now that our children are adults we still hold these same core values. Should they choose to engage in premarital sexual activity, that decision is theirs, as are the consequences.

So, I release.

They know what we believe and why. Now it is up to them to act in support of their beliefs and values. I may feel pain in response to decisions they make, but I cannot control those decisions. So, I release.   The point? Days of control, if they ever existed, are past. Days of influence can be here forever if we choose to cultivate relationships that foster influence.   You want a simple first step? Turn off the tracking software on your phone. Then take the next right step. You’ll sleep better and your kids may think you’re the wisest older adults they know.

About Julian Consulting

Dr. Stephen Julian is President of Julian Consulting, a firm specializing in team health, effective communication, and leadership development. He has worked with leaders and their teams for nearly 30 years in a variety of settings – including Africa, South and Central America.

https://www.julianconsulting.org

Join My E-mail List

And I’ll send you my article: Exaggerate to Make Your Presentations Funny. You’ll learn how to punch up your presentations with humor.