Look at most churches in America and it’s obvious—men as a gender group reject Christianity. Women make up over 60% of church attendance and the number grows when you measure involvement beyond worship services.
Why?
I’m guessing lots of reasons. But I think there are 2 cultural lies men believe that especially turn them away.
Lie #1: Jesus is a Wimp
I never hear this openly expressed. Probably if anyone did, indignant voices would protest in political correctness. Even from those who personally could care less about Jesus and Christianity. Which is exactly the point. That’s what I sense from many men.
They could care less about him. If you want to follow Jesus, well good for you. But he’s not a guy that I relate to as a man or see as relevant in my life. They don’t hate him. They’re simply indifferent.
This wimpy image is encouraged by a majority of the paintings that depict Jesus and the Hollywood movie characters that portray him. He’s commonly a delicate-looking, pacifist with long hair and soft features who wears long, flowing, dress-like robes.
His movie characters are so solemn, so benign, a paper doll has more dimension. Like a nice guy that wanders in benevolent aimlessness, performing good deeds, but with no real drive or purpose.
I’ve even seen movie characters of Jesus with blue eyes. Seriously?
To be honest, that image of Jesus doesn’t appeal to me either. I don’t relate to him or want to. So I understand why men reject him. And it’s unfortunate.
Because the Jesus in scripture is nothing like that guy. But you have to examine scripture. You have to ignore the modern artistic renderings and Hollywood scriptwriter’s interpretation of him that’s based on another Hollywood scriptwriter’s interpretation.
Here are some scriptural images that present a different view of him.
Jesus was a Carpenter
Although this fact is generally known, the difference between then and now is often misunderstood. A first century carpenter was nothing like a carpenter is today. No cool leather tool belts, pneumatic nail guns and smoothly milled two by fours. Scholars suggest they likely worked with stone more than lumber because rock was a far more abundant resource in that part of the world than trees.
Soft and delicate? A guy working outside hauling boulders more likely had a weather beaten, rugged physique.
Turn the other cheek?
Yes, Jesus said that. But the context was referring to a light slap of insult. Restraining yourself when someone tries to goad you rather than simply hauling off and slugging them. It’s not talking about an attempt to intimidate or harm you.
Take a closer look at his interpersonal encounters in scripture and you’ll see Jesus never cowered before, nor was he intimidated by anyone. Not the religious leaders of his day, the High Priest at his mock trial, or the Roman governor, Pontius Pilate that ultimately gave the nod for his crucifixion. He chose not to fight back because it was part of God’s plan. Not because he was a coward or weak.
A Man of Power, Purpose and Action
Jesus the carpenter was the only one NOT afraid in a boat among career fisherman, on a sea, in the middle of a raging storm. In fact, he stood and authoritatively commanded the storm to cease…and it did. Now that’s power.
Movies seldom capture it. But the Jesus in scripture had a very specific, very intentional purpose that he successfully accomplished. You can reject it…and the numbers confirm a majority of men do…but it’s hard to deny the very clear message when you take the time to read it.
Jesus assembled, trained and inspired an uneducated, rag-tag group of common men that effectively built an international following still thriving 2,000 years later. That’s influence and leadership. There’s something far more compelling, far more real about Jesus than the popular stereotype portrays.
Jesus was Meek
Think this contradicts the image of someone that commands a storm to cease? Not when you understand the Biblical meaning of meekness. Unlike, our modern idea of mild manner, passiveness, meek in its Biblical context means power under control.
Jesus had all the power in the world at his fingertips. But he chose to control it. Like a powerful stallion under the control of its rider. He submitted (not a term we like) himself to the will of His Heavenly Father. He didn’t have to accept crucifixion…he chose to. The most tortuous, most brutal form of execution ever devised. How many men today could do that…without ever breaking down into a whimpering mess? Jesus did.
Lie #2: I Can Do it Myself
Not only is Jesus considered a wimp, he’s a wimp that’s simply a crutch for guys who can’t stand on their own. That’s how many men view religion anyway. Real men don’t need help.
Frank Sinatra crooned I Did it My Way. Buford Pusser walked tall and carried a big stick. Martial arts expert Steven Seagal put down 10 guys with his bare hands without suffering a scratch. And Bruce Willis cracked fearless jokes while he single handedly defeated a small army in Die Hard.
The message? Man up. Do it yourself. And if you go down? Suck it up. Rub some dirt on it and walk it off.
Except sometimes when you go down you’ve actually torn something or broken something and you can’t walk it off. You’re in real, undeniable pain. At best, you hobble off the field with your arms around the shoulder of two other guys—one on the left and one on the right.
The truth? Sometimes you don’t have all the answers, all the resources, all the strength. Sometimes you hurt…maybe even cry. Sometimes you need friends and teammates that support you, that have your back. Sometimes you need help.
Of course, with all those lone hero role models that can shoot bazookas with one hand and shrug off mortal injuries like a flesh wound challenging your manhood, who’s going to admit it?
Okay, I will.
I believe my Godly role is to serve as provider and protector for my family. And for that, I must sometimes act as warrior. It explains my competitive nature. Where that drive and ambition comes from. It’s a natural expression of my masculinity. And I don’t apologize for it.
But for me, Jesus is not a wimp and following him does not mean handing in my manhood. It means submitting it to God through meekness—power under control. It means harnessing my natural drive and ambition into a purpose-driven faith. Choosing a path of integrity. Doing what is right in the eyes of God. Striving to be a man of principle and character.
And that takes both courage and walking in unity with other men. I will fall…often. And when I do, I will struggle to my feet and keep going. And sometimes…in real life…my brothers help me hobble off the field.
But I press on. Because the Jesus I find in scripture is someone I can respect and follow. And through the power of God, and the support of like-minded men, that’s what I will pursue.
I invite other men…real men…to join me.
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